Super Mario Arrested, Mushroom Kingdom Police Department celebrates.
Mushroom Kingdom – Earlier today Super Mario was arrested by the Mushroom Kingdom Police Department as he was leaving Bowser’s Castle. When approached for comment, the MKPD confirmed Mario’s arrested but declined to say what the charges were.
This is the second time the Italian plumber has been arrested this year. Earlier this year he was arrested at a routine roadblock when police found 99 gold coins in his possession.
This time however, its a lot more serious. According to a reliable source, this time the charges are as follows:
- Damage to public property. (Smashing bricks with his head)
- Possession and consumption of narcotics. ( Mushrooms are drugs)
- Killing of endangered species. (Those turtles he stepped on are almost extinct)
- Trespassing on private property. (Bowser has complained many times about him)
- Assault with intent to do grievous bodily harm ( He attacked Bowser)
- Arson. (He has been known to throw balls of fire)
My sources also reveal that the Princess has filed a restraining order against Mario.When asked to comment, Mario denied all charges saying that he was “just trying to save the princess.” Bowser, however, had a lot more to say.
According to Bowser, Mario had entered his castles on numerous occasions.He would then beat up the guards, destroy the flowers and throw balls of fire at Bowser. Mario’s actions eventually forced Bowser to release a public statement saying “I have no fucking idea where the princess is!”
Mario is due in court on Friday. We will bring you more on this story as soon as we make it up.- The Daily Informant